I am a “real” Black person.

Maya Segirah
Los Angeles, CA

I have heard this all my life, exclusively from white people (ok, men) , who, for some arrogant reason, think they have the right to tell who I am or what I should be, to the exclusion of my own experience. When I question their assumptions in any way I am met with anger, resistance and am often told of my own ignorance on the subject of my people…because THEY have the right to define me, but I don’t?

Keep the conversation going - comment and discus with your thoughts

  • Nikki

    I got this, too. I assume it’s because my parents have been together since they were 18, had children after marriage, sent us to private school, have us participate in extra-curricular activities, taken us on several vacations, made sure we got braces, make sure we’re well-mannered, and can speak proper English.

  • Amara

    I just love it (not) when other people know me better than I know myself.

    • Tim Childs

      You’re knocking around with the wrong men Amara! Seriously, if you are surrounded by people who don’t respect you for who you are, get new friends. I don’t know how old you are but I have learnt that sometimes you can have what I call toxic friendships that aren’t really friendships at all. If someone is disrespecting you, for any reason, friend, boyfriend, black, white, whatever, slowly cut them out of your life. It can be hard to do this, but it will be for the best. There is prejudice everywhere and we have to challenge it and to a certain extent rise above it. I say this as a white British person, who though never experiencing racism, experienced poverty and prejudice because of my class background and suffered low self-worth because of this and depression too at times. When we see the divine in others, and learn just to respect and tolerate others, we make a better world. You’ll find the friends you deserve if you want to.

  • WisdomSeed

    Real? Compared to what?

  • Jerry Atrixx

    The only time I have ever heard that label used properly was when someone exhibited self loathing and produced outward manifestation of that self loathing. If a black man or woman for that matter treats other blacks or people of color with disdain, racial prejudice, and/or bigotry I think it is fair to declare shenanigans.

    Be who you want, date who you want, define yourself in what way suits you as long as it isn’t destructive to you or to others irrespective of race.

 

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