My daughter is not like me.

Bea Melnarowicz, Chicago, IL My daughter is bi-racial: her father is Spanish-French-Mexican, and I am Eastern European Caucasian. I am often told she looks ‘nothing’ like me, even jokingly by some of my friends. I am surprised each time I hear this considering the age and time we live in. The tone is rarely friendly, […]

Who Will Your Children Play With

Linda Hunt CT I am in a 40 year bi-racial marriage and very early on when my children were small, my grandmother made the comment above. I said they will play with whoever they wanted as long as they were decent.


Black mom. Blonde daughter. She yours?

Amber Duke, New Albany, IN. My bi-racial daughter has her father’s blond hair and fair skin. Soon after she was born, I was shocked when people would randomly ask, “Is she yours?” Once, in an airport, when I responded yes, a woman challenged me saying, “…but she has blond hair.” Due to a new upgrade […]


Being biracial and adopted is complicated

Lauren Juanita Hines, Alexandria, VA. I am the American melting pot personified: born to a Mexican father and Caucasian (white, mostly Irish) mother, raised by a Lebanese mother and a German-Irish father. I remember weddings as a child where we all danced the Middle Easter dabke. Cousins on the other side of the family won […]

His parents will never meet me.

Kayle Dallas, TX Our breakup happened for many reason, but the main one is because his parents would never feel 100% comfortable with their son for being with me. I’m black and he’s white. Such simple labels that belie a myriad of different experiences. I would think that any parent would be thrilled their son […]

“Asian” to whites, “white” to Asians

Anonymous Being of mixed race can make a person feel out of place, and lacking of identity. My friend and I were talking about which race we feel closer to and he said to me, “white people think I’m Asian, Asian people think I’m white.” of mixed Asian and white I do feel similar. Being […]

Confederate re-enactor chose intimidation as spoils

Lillian J. Hall, Dallas, TX. I was a freshman in college. I was sitting in the dining hall with a friend, near a window. It was “Texas Day”. The theme was obvious by the bails of hay, western-wear-clad employes and of course, barbecue on the menu. My friend and I were chatting, when all of […]

My Kids: A Study in Beauty in Diversity

East Shore, White Shore: Segregation lives

Samuel P. Wilcock, Mechanicsburg, PA. Messiah College, Faculty. Just look at race by census track. The “West Shore” is over 90% white pretty much all over the place, while the “East Shore” is much more diverse and white is the minority in Harrisburg. We lived in Lemoyne, right across the river from the city, and […]


Being a mulatto woman is complicated.

Dorian N. Spokane, WA. I am mulatto. I have a black father and white mother. I love being bi-racial, I take pride in it and feel very lucky to have heritage that stems from two completely different directions, but it took many years to achieve this level of confidence, because when strangers, family and friends […]


Delicious ambiguity: the permanent inbetweener.

MaiLynn Stormon-Trinh New Zealand I am the only child of an American woman of Norwegian descent born in Fargo, North Dakota and a Vietnamese man who moved to the US in the mid-seventies and cut all his Vietnamese familial ties. I look more Asian than white, but culturally, I was raised in a white world, […]


Raising a bi-racial daughter in America.

Heather Sams, Moreno Valley, CA. My daughter is a beautiful, intelligent, biracial young lady. I am white and her father is a light skinned black man. I say those race terms that way because that is honestly how people in society view others, by color. My daughter is as pale skinned as I am. When […]


I am not your curiosity game.

Victoria, Salem, OR. As a biracial person, people often ask me, “what ethnicity are you?” – aka what race can I define you as? People who first meet me will ask me this question without ever asking for my name. They seem to only care about what I am not who I am. However, I […]

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They glare at my bi-racial son.

Linnette Derry, New York City, NY. I often think about the inevitable discussion about race that I will have to have with my son one day. That day when he will begin to ask me why people think I’m his nanny/housekeeper instead of his mother; the day when he will ask me why people keep […]


Who lives here? You or him?

Beth Brawley, Columbia, SC. My son is mixed race and when he was young a neighbor had a cousin over. They wanted to shoot a pellet rifle at cans. I told the neighbor and cousin they needed permission and I would supervise. The little boy who was visiting asked who lived at the house I […]


Where did you GET her from?

Beth Watson, Tacoma, WA. In ‘post-racial’ ( I use this term sarcastically) America, living in the Pacific Northwest, I can’t believe how many times I have been asked outright, “where did you get her from?” in response to seeing me and my bi-racial daughter in public. This question, of course, comes at the end of […]

What are you? The ubiquitous question.

Laura Mariko Cheifetz Atlanta, GA I call myself hapa yonsei. I’m biracial white Jewish and Japanese American, fourth generation on both sides. However, there are two assumptions that I run into all the time. First, “what are you?” People want to know my ethnic background (not racial… that doesn’t satisfy their intrusive curiosity), but they […]


Black AND White, no clear fit.

Barbara Jones, Albuquerque, NM. I was raised with a Northern European bias by Mom and family, my Black birth father not really being in the picture. It didn’t bother me being the only kid of color in our white family – you do get some interesting questions. When people speak of our first Black president, […]


I’m biracial. I can’t choose one.

Cortney Pouncey, Sacramento, CA. Being biracial, my hands have always been forced to choose what ethnicity I should identify as. In reality, I am just as black as I am white. How could I pick one and deny the other? I believe biracial people are the key to end racism.


I’m mixed, and discriminated by both.

Julie A. Perkins, NV. I’m 22 years old, half African America, half Caucasian. Because I’m black, I have been racially profiled and discriminated against because of my gender and skin color. But I’ve also had the terrible taste prejudice from many black people due to my mother being white and me not being full black. […]


Mommy, I want to be Vanilla.

Jasmin Marie Harpe, Burlington, NJ. It has been hard to fit in to both societies growing up as a biracial child, especially being in academia where there are few people who look like me. I had a lot of race issues growing up with my father who has very fair skin, and my mother who […]

You didn’t tell me he’s black

Katherine F., Minneapolis, MN. I met a woman through professional circles when I was recruiting for a volunteer project. As it happens, she lived near me. We formed committees for this initiative and began talking more socially on the phone. I went over to her house a few times for coffee. One weekend she invited […]


Yes, those boys are my brothers.

Julia Guerra, Austin, TX. My brothers are very important figures in my life. They were born to a white mom and a white dad. They are blonde and red-haired, with blue and green eyes. When they were little babies, my white mom married my Mexican dad and he adopted both of them as his own. […]


Tricia Stewart, Minneapolis, MN. I am bi-racial and I’ve experienced racism from both sides(black and white). You don’t always realize in the moment whether something has an impact on you, whether it be negative or positive; eventually in some form you will feel it. Only you can determine if you’re going to allow it to […]


Not “bi-racial”, not “mixed”, just human!

Tyler Brown, Washington, DC. As an African American and Irish American man ppl have referred to me as biracial or mixed for most of my life…both terms uncover misunderstandings about race and what makes a person. One being can’t be two races at the same time, neither can they be mixed like cake batter in […]

Aku Kodogo

Take away skin bag, spirit lives!

Aku Kadogo, teacher South Korea I am an African American woman from Detroit, MI. I have lived in Australia since 1978. My daughter is African American Australia (Caucasian father). My grand daughter’s father is from Thailand. I am currently living and teaching in S. Korea. I have spent many years with Indigenous people in Australia, […]


I didn’t think it was real!

Toya James, Albuquerque, NM. I am biracial (Black/White) and born in Cleveland in 1959. By “it” I mean race. I thought more people knew race is simply a social construct and that racism was something education erased. I have only recently realized how widespread the buy-in is in American society and that race was invented […]


Define my integrity, not my identity.

Erin Powell, Washington, DC. “Are you sure your dad is really black?” “If you imagine her with curly hair, you can tell she’s mixed.” “You look straight white, nothing else.” “Ugly half n*****.” Just a taste of the both disparaging and conflicting comments I’ve received on my YouTube vlog about my personal experience being biracial. […]

This man has your daughter

Karen Button, Middletown, CT. Phone call from the neighborhood grocer – followed by my husband on the line asking me to come down to the corner store to verify that he was in fact the father of our bi-racial infant daughter since they were used to seeing me with her and were refusing to let […]

Biracial. Never wanted to be white.

Anjali, USA. Growing up I feel like I only belong to my Sri Lankan culture and heritage because I dismiss the white part of myself. I am half Sri Lankan and half white, but I look tan. I wish I was darker. Some say I look white, but when I look at myself I can […]


I’m his mother, not the nanny.

Toya Dragseth, Saint Paul, MN. My youngest son is biracial. Has his Fathers genes, very light skinned, brownish blonde hair and when he is with just me, people look as if he is not my child but a child I may be babysitting. When he’s with his dad they look very natural together.

She gets to choose her identity

Felix Brooks Jr., Kalamazoo, MI As the father of a biracial child I told my daughter not to let anyone place a label on you. You get to choose for yourself . She took me up on that, and owned her own choice, and never struggled with who she was as a person .

Why can’t you be beige, mommy?

Janai Leeb, Val Verde, CA. My 5 year old, bi-racial daughter is just discovering that her family may be a little different. I’m a black American and my husband is Austrian. From her perspective, I look like the odd man out in our four person family.

I couldn’t rub the black out

Ima Oduok, Houston, TX. As a bi-racial child who grew up with her white family, I always wanted to look more like them. When I watch the movie “Belle” and saw Dido try to rub and beat out the darkness of her skin, I cried. I spent my childhood doing the same thing, hoping to […]

Bi-racial means you are nobody’s baby.

Silvija Singh, Pittsburgh, PA. Unlike my sibs, I do not look white, altho I have a white mother. I do not get treated like a Latvian, the way the blond-haired blue-eyed cousins on this side of the family do. Complexion-wise, I look more like my father, who was from India. But among Indians, I am […]


I have failed my biracial daughter.

Michele Malmstrom, Charlottesville, VA. My daughter has always had very low self-esteem. I tried her entire life to address the problem by complimenting her and giving her the tools for building her confidence: cello lesson, in which she excelled, girl scouts where she achieved the silver award, college educated with a B.A. and at 24 […]


Colorblindness renders me invisible to you…

Dr. NiCole T. Buchanan, East Lansing, MI. I don’t want people to be blind to my color. Instead, I want them to see me in my entirety, including the fact that I am a Biracial Black woman, and I want them to actively embrace these parts that make me whole. I believe most people have […]

Obama isn’t black. He is bi-racial.

Dan Brown, DeWitt, MI. Michele, you can’t have it both ways. If, as you said last night, you view Obama as black (you said “of color”) then you won’t reach a “post racial” status. To say that he’s black leads us back to the “single drop of black blood” interpretation of race. Consider: If Obama […]

Scared that we are not enough

Tanya, Manakin Sabot, VA. My (adopted) son is biracial, his bio-father is unknown. I will never be able to connect him with his biological African American family. There is a void that I will never be able to fill for him . This breaks my heart as his mama.


Bi-racial daughter draws Black self portraits.

Malika Los Angeles, CA Our daughter began to draw what she saw in the world very early. She wakes up from vivid dreams, grabs a sheet of paper and illustrates the thunder and lightning, fairies and wizards, monsters and princesses from her nighttime imagination. Having grown up in America as a woman of African ancestry, […]

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Mixed heritage. Feeling strange growing up

Katie Moore New Echota, GA I used to hate the way I looked growing up. My mom & brother had fair skin & freckles & I had darker skin & hair. I like the way I look now. I’m proud of my heritage. I am of cherokee, creek, German,& African decent. I stand taller than […]

I will birth a bi-racial baby

Lindsey Hollister, CA My dad is one of 9 children and the only to procreate within our race. This seems to mean that I am expected to do the same. Little do they know, I have been secretly engaged for two years and am now expecting…

Growing up biracial was very painful.

Jim Roberts Atoka, TN I’m half Caucasian and half Asian. Growing up in the rural South during the eighties was a painful and humiliating experience. It seemed as if the only racial identities anyone could process were “black” or “white.” Fitting into neither category assured my brother and me years of abuse from all sides, […]

Why is Obama black, not white?

Ed Morganroth, Jr. Plover, WI I have wondered since Mr. Obama broke onto the national scene why both he and the media have always characterized him racially as black and not as biracial or white. Why did he decide to pick one race – he is indisputably half black and half white? I would think […]

Ambiguously different from everyone else. Stereotypes.

Jessica Winfrey Portland, OR I am biracial and bicultural and was educated for the first 6 years in a very diverse school on an air force base in North Dakota. After my parents divorced, my mom and I moved into the neighboring town, which was predominately white. I recall being warned ahead of time that […]


We’re ALL remixed and it’s great!

Timothy Ross Lee Salt Lake City, UT I’ve always thought that being biracial (1/2 Formosan and 1/2 Irish American) was so lucky. I get to identify with the best of two worlds. We’re all mixed and we live in a world, that for the most part, is a patchwork of culture and race. Let’s celebrate […]

Mixed Family all about love, always

Jeffery Sweet Kenosha, WI I am white and my wife is black. We have a son who is the most beautiful person in this world. I hope he grows up to understand that race isn’t an issue, just a fact of life and a reason to try harder to show people that look, I am […]

TV people don’t look like us

Ana Artigas Houston, TX I am the child of an Italian-American mother and Spanish (from Spain) father, and I was born in Mexico. I am married to an American man of Dutch and British ancestry, We have friends in mixed race marriages. All of us have children, and there are very few TV programs, none […]

I’m not a mutt, I’m human

Krystal Moss Columbia, SC I’m 16 years old and growing up around Blythewood SC was a really hard thing. When I was little kids would call me a mutt and pick at me. They’d try to cut my curls off and say many hurtful things about my race. For a long time I was afraid […]


Always, what are you? Long story.

Mariko Lockhart, Seattle, WA. Collected from The Race Card Project, On Location: Seattle Community Colleges My dad was black, born in Panama, as my grandfather from Monserrat went there to work on the Canal. My grandmother was from Jamaica. They moved to Chicago where my dad grew up on the South Side. My mom’s parents […]

Mixed or not. All equals humanity

Pete Kersey Vero Beach, FL To clarify…it doesn’t matter if you are talking about mixed marriages, mixed blood lines or pure stock of any race….all are human and should be treated with equal high levels of human kindness and dignity.

There isn’t a box for Other

Traci Butler USA I’m a Caucasian mother of a beautiful, amazing little girl who happens to be of mixed heritage, because her father is from Africa. I have a difficult time when it comes to school forms or paperwork for doctor’s offices, because they don’t give you a box for “mixed ethnicity” or a space […]


Seattle, please stop fearing black folks.

Roland Groce, Jr., Seattle, WA. All 52 years of my life has been affected by white privilege and racism. My son is bi-racial, now graduated from college and approaching grad school at a racist institution (University of Washington). I am concerned that at the UW, Asian people have taken over and continuing to carry out […]

Biracial. Choosing everyone instead (of) no one

Sarah Seattle, WA Growing up biracial in a small, conservative, and rural town often left me feeling like I didn’t belong. No one could fully relate so I was shy and reserved. As I grew older, I realized that being biracial and bicultural is a gift that enables me to connect with a broad spectrum […]

This grandma’s love is color blind.

Mara Davis Bermuda Dunes, CA I have one mixed grand-daughter and i love all of my grand-children. Love is not shaped by skin color but by the quality of the interaction between 2 people. This is my family now and I strongly resent anyone mocking us because one child appears different. One day, a new […]

Yeah, but you’re not BLACK black.

Ruthie Mengistu Memphis ,TN What does that even mean? Is it because I look biracial? Or is it because my parents are first-generation Americans from Ethiopia, and I grew up in the suburbs with predominantly white folk? Maybe it’s because I don’t talk “black”…whatever that means. There are a lot of different ways to be […]

Por supuesto que soy su mamá

Sonia Kang Northridge, CA Are you their mom? As a biracial mom (Black/Latina) married to a Korean man with children who look more Asian than anything else, we are often looked at with curiosity. They look at them then at me. Is she the nanny? Who can she be? Whether at their Korean language immersion […]

Biracial??! Maybe. But, call me black.

Tiffanie Luckett Greenbelt, MD I was adopted at nine months of age. My parents are black. My biological parents were Caucasian and black. My parents expected the world to see me as black (or “other than white”), and raised me accordingly. I was raised to see myself as black, and I find it unsettling/strange/uncomfortable when […]


“She’s so pretty for being Black”

Morgan Cooper, Stockton, CA. In 2007, when my ex husband and I were expecting our baby girl, we jokingly called her “Blackanese”, a term I still use endearingly. Most simply put, I am half Black and half White and my ex husband is half Japanese and half White. Never in our wildest dreams did we […]

I’m biracial but others see black.

Willie McBride Long Beach, CA I was born in Taiwan to a Chinese mother and African American father. I was orphaned an American serviceman and his wife adopted me; my adopted father just happens to be African American and my mother is Chinese. They also never mentioned that I was adopted and so I grew […]

My kids mark Navajo not Caucasian

Ginee Scarbough St. Johns, AZ In this crazy world where being white is a bad thing, my mix raced hubby and mix race children mark only Navajo or Native. I hate that we can’t be proud of being my heritage of Scottish, English, and French, but can be “Navajo Proud”. I feel left out. A […]

You are the color of us

Jennifer Davis St. Augustine, FL I am a white mother of two bi-racial children. It is hard when society identifies them as black when they are an equal part white. But more than that, they are Milo as much as they are Jen, they are outspoken as much as they are unsure, they are me […]

What will my children look like?

Madeline Murphy New Orleans, LA My father is white. My mother is black. My experiences and perspective as someone who is visibly “mixed” is something I greatly want for my own children – and can’t help but worry about. What if my children look white and people identify them as such? What if they look […]

Curiosity about race is only natural.

Keiko McCracken Anacortes, WA I am half white, half Japanese. I can’t count the times someone has asked about my race, commented on my looks or name, or altered their response to me based on how I appear. As a child, I was teased because of my background; as an adult, I’ve had someone run […]

White mom of bi-racial child forgotten.

Peggy Person Cleveland, TN I have always been so disappointed in “America”, for labeling bi-racial, or mixed race children as one race or the other. I am a white woman, who has had to listen to society brainwash my child into believing that he can be accepted as “anything but white”. I raised him to […]

Black, not White, not Biracial!

Pamela Marshall Milwaukee, WI Life long experiences in dealing with racial ignorance is taking its toll. Being light enough that whites assume you are one of them has allowed me to hear racist comments that would have not been spoken, had they known they were in the presence of a black woman. Then my struggle […]

Do you date outside your race?

Toya James Albuquerque, NM I am first generation biracial Black/White, aka multiracial like everyone else if you go back far enough. Also: “Is your father in the military?” inferring why else could you be in Albuquerque.

Biracial anxiety; black/white; both/neither?

Tracey Frierson North Ridgeville, OH Version 2:  biracial anxiety; black/white; neither/both! I have two adult biracial daughters, three years apart, raised in the same home under similar circumstances- one for whom racial identity has been problematic, the other who identifies herself as Black and has always seemed to adjust positively to that aspect of her […]

The Art and Racket of Passing

Raven Cincinnati, OH In parts of Eastern North Carolina the lines between black, bi-racial and Native American is blurry and sometimes nonexistent. I went to school with the great(x3) grandchildren of my family’s slaveholders. Our families share the same last name. Upon leaving I learned that my green eyes, light skin and curly hair were […]

I’m not half white, still mixed.

Brandi Artez Boston, MA I’ve had this debate a lot over the years, where usually white people, will tell me that I’m wrong to consider myself bi-racial, because I’m Black and Latina. It’s the craziest thing. Someone actually said to me that since White is the dominant race in the US, unless I’m half white, […]

Slavery’s legacy haunts “value” of blacks

Piper Kendrix Williams Wyndmoor, PA This morning (6/27/13) I heard the story on Morning Edition’s Race Card segment of the sliding fee scale based on the race of a child being adopted. The conversation touched on the difficulty and complicated nature of assigning differing “value” to black, bi-racial, and white children. It seemed clear to […]

your (biracial) children are so beautiful

Angela Flynn Providence, RI Of course it’s true, but on some level I can’t help but think they wouldn’t draw as much attention from perfect strangers if they were only black or only white. I also know for a fact that my biracial daughter will have a more positive experience in the white world than […]


One white, one brown, same parents.

Adana, Seattle, WA. I have 2 children. My son looks just like his papa: dark, wavy hair and alabaster skin. My daughter looks like me: golden skin and curly brown hair. When I’m out with my son, I’m asked if I’m his nanny. When I’m out with both kids, I’m asked if they have the […]

My skin does not define me.

Marcus Atlanta, GA Born of African American parents, raised by my African American mother and Irish-German (adopted) father. Big brother to a bi-racial sister and my cousins are white, Asian and Latino.

Biracial. Which box do I check?

Katherine M Clement Genoa, IL As a biracial child growing up in the mid 60’s I remember agonizing over school forms where you were asked to check ONE box. Recently, while filling out employment papers for a large corporation, I encountered this again. My first reaction was anger that “check only one box” was still […]

Bi-Racial: I’m not “Mexican” enough?

Monica Santa Monica, CA I grew up in Texas in a small town where the population is roughly half Mexican and half white (German, Polish, Irish, etc.). I myself am half Mexican and half Irish. Funny enough, a lot of my friends are also bi-racial. When I moved away from Texas, I was shocked by […]

“Mom, am I black?”

David Denver, CO Four words that chill my heart. We had adopted our biracial son when he was 15 months. Now, at four years old, he had come in from playing with his friends and asked Mom, “am I black”? Am I black?, as if there was something wrong with black. As if white was […]

Don’t cry. Mama loves your curls.

Hilary Roberts-King Baltimore, MD Children’s books and Sesame Street make multi-cultural living look so easy. Of course I want my daughters to be proud of their beautiful biracial hair. Of course I genuinely admire my daughters’ beautiful curls. But it is so much more complex than that. It’s not just hair.