Fear and reconciliation: oil and water

Dirk Elting, Honolulu, HI. People cannot reconcile their differences when they do not feel safe. We scare (and anger) one another not only through our acts, but through our criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling and contempt. What psychologist John Gottman has shown to be true for couples, I believe to be true for race relations. I have […]

How come I was not invited?

Carolyn Hisako Okinaga, Honolulu, HI. I asked this question when I was growing up on Ewa Plantation. Ethnic groups were housed in separate villages on the plantation based on race and position, e.g., Filipinos laborers lived in Fernandez Village, Japanese in B Village, etc. All of the caucasian (“haole”) supervisors/bosses lived in Renton Village; they […]

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$200 cordblood storage; few hapa donors

Gianna Crosetti Bickson, Honolulu, HI. “Hapa” is the Hawaiian work for mixed and usually refers to someone of mixed race who is at least part Asian or Pacific Islander. My husband is of Hawaiian, Chinese, Filipino & Japanese ancestry and my family is Italian, Russian English. This makes our kids “Hapa Haole”. While slang, the […]

I’m here to change your stereotypes

Denali Lukacinsky, Honolulu, HI. People look at me and assume all kinds of offensive things about what black people are supposed to be like, they come up to me and explain all the ways that I’m “different”, and “better” and “not like them.” Well guess what, I am like them. Don’t lift me up by […]