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Flay the eyes of a daughter.

Abbie Parajon,
Santa Rosa, CA

Since I was born, my eyes have been praised to be my most beautiful inheritance. My mother’s family resembles the indigenous who walked this land before all. Soil skin, strong hands, and deep brown eyes. Decades of Spanish influence and racial class systems deciding the value of your soul based on the color of your skin painted an ancient beauty over with rust, and this generationally-carried standard has been established into modern audiences. When I visited family in Guanajuato, Mexico, mothers and aunts flocked to praise my own, to praise my fair skin and bright eyes. When my Abuelita won a beauty pageant during her teenage years living in Mexico, heartbroken girls saw only what they didn’t have– what they were told was beauty. When a child is born on the homeland of her indigenous ancestors, a mother will look into the eyes of her baby and frown, shaking her head to a familiar grief, and say “Que pena, ella salió india”. We were taught to be ashamed of our roots, to erase our identities, to sit in a cage and clip our wings for daring to grow feathers a color other than those of a dove. The bond of countless mothers and daughters, continuing to be severed by an invisible knife planted long ago.

In a Class of My Own

Marcus Garcia,
Chicago, IL

I chose these words that have been plucked straight out of InuYasha. If you aren’t familiar, InuYasha is about a half-demon who goes through much adversity and is often ridiculed for being both half-demon and half-human. During one fight, he yells out these words and proves himself as a worthy opponent against his full-demon enemy. I myself am a mix of Mexican and African American without really retaining the traits of falling into one group or the other so to speak. There’s something fascinating to me about someone who doesn’t fit in anywhere but finds solace in carving his own path that is deviant from either group. As much as I would love to learn Spanish, the few times I’ve tried to speak it has been ripped to shreds by someone who has spoken it since they were a kid while I was not. As much as I would love to pretend my skin is black, it still resembles a side of me I couldn’t fully connect to anyway. Yet I see both of these cultures as their own thing while I’m neither, and still find something to admire about both.

A Southern Belle? No. Korean husband.

korean soutern belleLeah Lee (now Leah Durst-Lee),
Chicago, IL.

Keeping cultural heritage is very important to me, so when I married my husband, Sihyun Lee, I wanted our kids to have a Korean surname. Our first year and a half of marriage, I took my husband’s name and became ‘Leah Lee.’ It was awful! Almost everyone I introduced myself to stifled a laugh and proceeded to ask me something about the American South. My mom is a Californian and I am from Iowa, so naturally I couldn’t speak to anything ‘Southern.’ Once people grew to know me more, many insisted on a nickname of ‘LeahLee’ slurred together in a Southern drawl. Needless to say, I recently hyphenated my name and haven’t received a single new Southern belle quip.

Hey Dominicans! You too are black.

My_FB_PicCristina Reyes,
Houston, TX.

I chose the six words I wish I could go around the streets of Santo Domingo yelling. I have never understood, in all my years, why the Dominican culture steadily continues to deny their “blackness.” Their children aren’t taught to consider themselves “negro” instead they are to consider themselves “indio.” The darker the skin the uglier person, the straighter the hair the prettier the girl.
I love my Dominican Heritage and I am proud to be American, but what I am most proud of is that I descended from strong and beautiful Africans that despite being subjected to the most inhumane and atrocious acts in history, their legacy can be kept alive in my face and dark skin.

I was always already right here

Marta Elena Muñoz,
Austin, Tejas (TX)

Go back to where you came from. Imagine telling an American citizen of Mexican heritage (indigenous and Spanish mix) to go back to where I came from. As if this isn’t my ancestral land. As if “manifest destiny” and slave ownership weren’t reasons my ancestral lands were taken away. And now Texas government wants to build walls and vilify immigrants, as if this whole country wasn’t invaded and pillaged by white immigrants. As long as people want to avoid history, want to avoid their white guilt, want to disparage other nationalities, this country will continue to suffer from the internal festering. In the meantime, I am back to where I came from and where I have always been. And I welcome anyone that wants to share this American experience, one that has potential for greatness for all, whether you came here by choice or not. After all, would you be here if it weren’t for your parents?

My children won’t rob you

image31Shamica,
Oklahoma City, OK.

I never knew that becoming a mom would be different based on race. I was raised on military bases, everyone got along. I knew that people could be racist but I never really experienced it. I was . . . naive. Then I married my husband, at a young age, then we had kids. I realized quickly that a good amount of people assumed I was a single mom or teen mom, when the truth is I valued my body enough that I saved myself for my husband. As my kids grew and we decided to have a larger family, I would be asked random questions like “Do they have the same father?”. But the worst was listening to my 8 year old daughter ask me why a little boy at church called her a mudface. Or when she became a teenager and was told by another teen that a certain boy wouldn’t think she was pretty because she’s black. Or how about the fact that I have to tell my boys not to wear hoodies in public, because someone may think they look suspicious. When truly they are just cold. I don’t mind raising my children to be respectful people and productive members of society, that has always been my goal. I mind that I have to worry if someone will shoot my honor student because they “fit the profile”.

2042 can not come fast enough.

NHJ-at-overpriced-Turkish-Coffee-hotel-in-Diyarbakir-TurkeyNathan Henderson-James,
Oakland, CA.

6 words is obviously limiting. However, my 6 reflect my own experience growing up as one of the few white kids in my local public schools. It was an education being constantly in the minority (in school, outside of those walls, I was comfortably back in a white affluent world) and one that more people with white skin privilege need to go through. It breed empathy, understanding, and a full 360 degree view of people from outside your own background. You get the good, the bad, and the ugly. It made me better at dealing with difference and better at interrogating my own prejudices, internalized racism, and privilege. It wasn’t sufficient to make me struggle for racial justice, but it was, for me, a necessary component for striding that path. And that’s why I picked my 6 words. Because people with white skin privilege need to experience being the only one more often. It won’t be sufficient to build the political will to change the institutional racism in our various national systems and culture, but it is necessary to help build the shared experience necessary to have an honest conversation about getting there.

White guy (at) black church, met wife.

Rose-RandyRandy Nelson,
Gilbert, AZ.

At the end of a failed marriage, I explained my love of gospel music (my first record purchase was Bobby Blues Bland when I was 7 years old) to our marriage counselor. She “made” me go to a black church as part of my recovery. That led me to be open to the possibility to dating a black women. I met Rose on Match.com and we have been gloriously married for 12 years!

Blending traditions from my strong heritages.

Rebecca,
Battle Creek, MI

I’m very mixed — Japanese, Irish, Indian, and Romani — but most people just assume I’m a regular white girl in the U.S. There’s obviously nothing wrong with being white, but when I tell people what I’m mixed with, they usually don’t believe me. A lot of people ask, “What are you?” meaning what I’m mixed with or if I’m “just white.” What do you all think?

White baby in the black projects.

Jamie Bishop,
Florence, MA.

I am a bastard child conceived in the back seat of a Chevrolet in 1965. When I was born, I was sent to an orphanage. I don’t know what all happened, but my grandfather, (Daddy, or Mr. Bishop) had strong feelings about family duty, and five days later, against my grandmother’s will, he went and got me. From what I understand, since Daddy was the one that insisted that I be kept, my grandmother insisted that I be his full responsibility. They adopted me, and my mother became my sister; the mystery of the details surrounding my adoption is a story for another time.

I don’t know a whole lot about my grandparents. They didn’t talk about their families or their lives very much. Most of what I know is very basic or learned second hand. I do know that you can’t be any more native Texan than my families and still be white. My ancesters were the first white people to settle Texas. My grandparents’ parents were farmers who grew cotton and raised cattle with the aid of share croppers. My grandparents were both born in North East Texas in 1917. Daddy was born in Krum; my grandmother was born in Prosper. They each had 7 siblings. They met in Denton, married in Oklahoma, lived in Denton for a while, then moved to Dallas sometime in the 1940’s.

Daddy enlisted in the army during WWII, and became a seargent in the motor pool stationed in the Phillipines. When he came back to Dallas he landed a contract with Ezell Randall, owner of Terminal Taxicab Company. Randall was one of the first successful black business men in Dallas. Daddy set up Bishop’s Auto Repair down on Munger Ave. across the street from the black projects where many of the taxi drivers lived. Down at the cab stand and all over the black part of town, he was known as Mr. Bishop. He was often the only white man in sight. Terminal Taxi grew to be the largest cab company in Dallas with a fleet of about 950 cabs by the mid 1980s. Bishop’s Auto Repair painted, equipped, and serviced every single one of them for 45 years.

For the first five years of my life, Daddy, the cab drivers, and their families were my primary caregivers. I was known down at the cab stand and in the projects as Little Bishop. My playpen was constructed of three tractor tires piled one on top of the other, and placed in the shade near the engine hoist and tire machine. I spent the majority of those five years happily playing in grease and dirt with taxicab meters, auto parts, and tools. I went to a local preschool. I loved loving and being loved to pieces by the cab drivers and their families down in the projects. I was happy and safe there. Those first five years were the closest I ever came to being nurtured. It all came to an end when I was five.

In spite of the situation, my grandparents were racists. My grandmother thought I was picking up bad habits in the projects, so she decided I should go to kindergarten at a fine private school in North Dallas. All of a sudden, I was thrust into a class conscious, wealthy white culture. I had no context, no social map, and I certainly didn’t have the proper clothes (I remember very clearly the importance of not owning a pair of Tretorn tennis shoes). Daddy, the shop, the taxi drivers, their families, and the projects were gone. Little Bishop got very lost, and she’s never managed to find her way back home.

Grew Up Black. Now part Mexican.

Michelle Y. Bess,
Chicago, IL.

My mom is from California, my dad is from NYC. They raised my 4 siblings and me in Washington State. We grew up identifying as black. Recently, on a trip home, my mom learned that our family moved from Mexico to California on a covered wagon to begin a new life.

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