I am a white, conservative woman in my middle years. I grew up poor but with a lot of sacrifice, perseverance and overcoming many obstacles, I would be considered upper middle class now. I am fit, young looking for my age and dress in classic style.
I am also immediately judged for being a snob, intolerant, racist, homophobic, anti-women, anti-immigration – I guess the opposite of ‘woke’. This is undeserved – I’m being judged by the color of my skin/hair and where I live. Without even trying to get to know me! Black women are immediately hostile to me, even though I approach them as the equals we are. I don’t proselytize, I’m not hostile smug or unkind but I’m treated as such by anyone with a darker skin tone than mine – without me haven spoken a word. I don’t have political (or any) stickers on my car – I am just a human being trying to connect with other human beings. It didn’t used to be this way when I was younger. People were just people – if you were kind people were kind back.
Black people weren’t being told they are victims of a society that will never accept them do why even try, but instead told they had the potential for greatness just like we all do. Minorities with something to offer their new country came to the US to build the life they couldn’t in their home country due to war, racism, classism, corruption and they did well, instead of being told they’re entitled to enter even if they won’t be successful or don’t want to integrate.
If you don’t want to be judged don’t judge. Every person is different – seek out those who respect you and then respect them. If you want to be successful, don’t let opinions hold you back. Get an education, learn a trade, don’t have children until you’ve completed at least high school and not until you are married. Always work – and no matter how humble your job is, do your very best. Start saving when you are young – even if it’s just $20/month – save without ceasing! Stay out of jail and away from people who lead you down bad paths. Yes, you may have to embrace loneliness sometimes but stay focused, it will pay off! Don’t use drugs – not even alcohol.
None of them are harmless. Don’t smoke and try to get a little exercise every day even if it’s just a walk around the block – it helps with depression, type 2 diabetes and weight. You’ve got this – your race is not your excuse to underachieve. Many have gone before you and have done marvelous things. You can you.
Most of all – don’t judge others by how they look.