No. I’m not your average face.
Clara Chun,
Los Angeles, CA.
I’m a Thai-Chinese, Korean, White girl. It’s about as confusing as it sounds, but I refuse to not acknowledge a single part of my identity. Because all of it exists.
Our boys died for your kind
Deborah Halperin,
Bloomington, IL
A man said this to me while we were in line at the post office. I was 18 and had just moved from Hawaii to Iowa for college. I am part Chinese and Filipino. I look Asian. He must have thought I was Vietnamese? Korean? I was caught off guard. I said nothing. No one ever said anything like that to me. In Hawaii we all look “hapa” but not on the mainland.
To fit everywhere and nowhere.
Madison Le Lam Carter
Canada
Chinese/Vietnamese and Irish/Scottish
Asian descendent so is it wrong??
Ian Shi C
Malaysia
I’m Malaysian and some people classify me as other other races. It’s just silly. Just because I don’t look or act like a Malay or Chinese. There’s even a race column on my ID. It’s stated ‘Chinese’. Anybody had something like this? Plus I don’t get it why people are still racist nowadays.
Adobo Beef Stew Rice Potatoes: Dinner
James Estanislao Herr,
Los Angeles, CA.
Dad’s side came over in 1717–Swiss-German and Irish with some Danish and Greek thrown in. Mom came over in 1954. Filipino, Spanish and Chinese with I guess some Portuguese somewhere along the way given my middle name. Grew up in an all white community outside Philadelphia. Not sure who I was but I didn’t fit in. Moved to LA in my 30’s and found a community that looked like me–or what I thought looked like me. Still have to introduce myself as Filipino. But also found Hapa’s and Tisoy’s and Mestizo’s in all kinds of mixes and colors, shapes and sizes. We all have our way of identifying who we are and why. I find comfort in the brown side of my heritage but still proud of all of it. One conversation I’ve had with many mixed race friends, that I haven’t heard in general public discussions. When you choose to marry and have kids, does your mother’s side or your father’s side become the anomaly. This used to bother me a lot more when I was younger. Not so much today. Thank you for this Project and this opportunity.
Learn more about Estanilao Herr’s six words on NPR’s Morning Edition
Identify myself as Chinese or American?
Anni Yang,
Commack, NY
Too Chinese to be American but I am an American citizen
White washed, but I’m half Asian
Sam Spencer,
West Burlington, IA
People assume I understand Chinese culture and heritage because I am half Chinese, when really I know nothing about it. I was born and raised in a majority Caucasian society, and my parents have raised me according to the culture around me.
No, I’m “really” from New York.
Kate Lee van Loveren,
Ann Arbor, MI.
I was born in New York, grew up in New York, and live in New York (when I’m not at school). I’m of half Chinese and half Dutch descent, but for some people that registers into me not being American for some reason. Just by looking at me, people will ask where I’m from. I will say New York and ask where they are from, knowing the question they’re going to ask next. Like expected, they ask where I’m REALLY from because I must have been lying to them the first time. I’m REALLY from New York. Did you know that people from other countries can immigrate into the United States and live in America and raise families in America and have American citizenship and be AMERICAN? Fascinating, I know.
My Dad said “Jap”. Everyone blushed.
Malcolm Gin,
Berkeley, CA.
My Dad is Chinese and 86 years old. He was stationed in the Pacific Theater during World War II, fighting on the United States’ side. Nearly got his butt shot off several times for looking and being Asian, by our own side. Lately he was talking about his experiences in the war with a Japanese acquaintance and, in the moment, called the soldiers on the Japanese side, “Japs”. And all the white people participating in the conversation got really on-edge, though I don’t think my Dad, our Japanese guest or I (half Chinese, half white) were nearly so bothered. My only thought at the time, “There’s worse words than that!”
Chinese, Japanese parents; I speak neither
Patricia Lee,
Cortez, CO
When people find out that my father was Chinese and my mother was Japanese, they sometimes ask if I am trilingual. Nope. I try to explain that they did not speak each others’ languages, either. English was the language of our household, as if by tacit understanding it was “neutral territory” languagewise.
My parents remembered that those two countries had fought each other. In fact, my father sometimes referred to Japanese as “red devils”. Fights tended to dredge up such garbage. My brother and I kept our mouths shut and our only language, American English.
What White people sometimes are ignorant of is that Asia contains MANY countries, some of whom regard another as an enemy even when any military war was over long ago.
Walls can be made by things other than skin color.
Chinese not always good at mathematics
Thedoe,
China
Stereotypes make one dizzy, facing immense pressure every morning. Everyone assumes that being good at mathematics is an inherent ability of Chinese people, but in reality, it’s a heavy burden. If I can’t achieve it, it’s my own fault, and if I do, there’s no sense of accomplishment, as if it’s something I should do.
So where do you come from?
Michael Chan,
Maplewood, MN.
I am half Chinese and half Caucasian, but my German and Hebrew language skills are much stronger than my Cantonese skills (my family’s language). So when I get the question, “Where do you come from?,” I laugh internally and typically spend a few seconds trying to figure out what exactly I’m being asked.
Where are you from China? Korea?
Anonymous,
Aurora, CO
As an Asian-American I am typically asked by my peers where I am from, or automatically assume I am either Chinese or Korean.
My Foreign Land, My Children’s Homeland.
Robert Fang
Plano, TX
I am a Chinese. I came to US in 1977 when I was 27, full grown. My children were all born in US and raised in Texas. When my first son was 5 years old, I asked him casually, in Chinese, “Are you a little Chinese or a little American.? (你是小中國人還是小美國人?” Without hesitation, he said back in Chinese, “Little American. 小美國人” When he was 15, I asked, again in Chinese, “Are you Chinese or American?你是中國人還是美國人?” He answered back in English, “American”. When he was 25, I asked him the same question for the last time, in English, “Are you Chinese or American?” With a low and firm tone he said, “Dad, I am an American.” After raising a stepdaughter and two sons I realized that, they are truly Americans. All my Chinese friends call their kids ABC, American Born Chinese. I prefer to call them CPA, Chinese Parented Americans. On the other hand, after living here for 35 years I am still a Chinese. I wrote a Poem, in Chinese, called “異域故鄉, Foreign Land, Homeland” YiYuGuXiang
When do I become just-American?
Wen Wen Yang
Dallas, TX
I tell people I’m Chinese-American. My parents are Chinese, born and raised in China, while I was born and raised in the United States, so I think the term Asian-American is accurate. I am straddling the divide, but leaning towards American – I’ve never been to China and do not speak Chinese. My taste in food leans Chinese.
However, I wonder my friends who people will call, and may call themselves, African-Americans and wonder how long you’d have to trace their history to reach Africa. How many generations must be born here to be called American, even if we don’t ‘look’ like it?
Not Chinese. Don’t really fit anywhere.
Brandon Milard
o,
Somerville, MA.
Me with my parents at graduation in 2012.
Stopping myself from hating white people
Simone,
Canada.
I’m Asian-Canadian, and honestly, it’s kind of hard not to feel just plain alienated right now. It’s just gotten bad lately.
The level of xenophobia towards Chinese, or anyone assumed Chinese, is seriously tiring. It’s maybe the straw on the camel’s back here. It reminds me of my early childhood in Vancouver seeing stuff like “Chinese go home” graffiti etc.
If it’s not me- because I have a very decidedly Canadian accent and don’t even speak my native language- it’s targeted at people who look like me, the kinds of people who honestly have no difference from my ama, from my relatives, from my parents.
I’m becoming self-conscious when people go out of their way to avoid me when I’m out. I don’t think I’ve seen any fellow Asians without masks, most people who aren’t white tbh wear masks. I wear masks. But the focus is on my community all the same.
I don’t hate white people, and I know there’s a lot of amazing people. But saying I feel alienated is an understatement. There’s a serious feeling that I should just stick to my own and maybe eventually leave though Canada’s where I was raised since I was 2.
