White Mom + Chinese daughter: Said right in my face, with my 5 year old daughter in my lap. She clutched me, buried her face in my chest and sobbed. I put my arms around her said don’t be disrespectful and walked out of the shop.
My mother is caucasian and my father is black. I have immense privilege in my life, and I feel that being a biracial woman gives me a sense of pride which leads to strength and confidence. But this comes at a cost. I am often referred to as “acting white” by colleagues, friends, and even family members. I also feel as though I am looked to to defend or represent the “black perspective” on a number of things professionally. This causes confusion. This causes pain.
Contemplating all of these emotions in the context of being a wife to a black man and a mother to two interracial children has made my identify exploration evermore challenging and complex. Being biracial is a lifelong learning experience – one I embrace proudly.
I work in equity so I think and talk about racism a lot. It’s easy to get discouraged when I don’t remember the enormity of the wound that we are trying to heal. Huge parts of our country were developed around forced labor camps and governed by human traffickers. That’s a pretty deep hole to climb out of before we can even contemplate higher ground. We are not who we need to be, but also not what we once were. There is hope in that.
A society which chooses to live with such oppression and misery becomes a society without trust or hope: a nation of desperate confidence men hoping they too will not be nothing, despised, a thing without hope.
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