preconceived notions Archives - The Race Card Project

I’m never asked about hot sauce.

January 21, 2024January 21, 2024 Ann Arbor, Christine R., hot sauce, MI, preconceived notions, stereotype

Christine R.
Ann Arbor, MI

Before I started dating my “black” boyfriend, I really didn’t think about race very much or the privilege I inherited with my “white” skin. There have been times that people have made rude comments or asked, what I would consider, overtly racist questions upon learning of our interracial relationship. However, I find the hot sauce question often posed to him interesting because I believe it is asked without malice. I have never been asked if I want hot sauce at a restaurant regardless of what I order. Never. I cannot count how many times my boyfriend has been asked if he wants hot sauce while dining out without much regard to his order. One time a waitress brought a bottle of hot sauce to him without asking if he needed it while saying “I know you will need this sweetie.” My boyfriend does not like hot sauce. I have dined at the same place in the same week with my brother, who ordered the same dish my boyfriend did earlier in the week, but there was never an offer of hot sauce. Some may think the question of hot sauce is an innocent one. However, assumptions have been made about my boyfriend’s preferences based on the racial category he is perceived as belonging to. What other preconceived notions are being generated about my boyfriend in addition to his love of hot sauce?

Black lesbian CPA, it’s really me.

April 11, 2023April 11, 2023 Andrea Hyson, Black, CA, CPA, Lesbian, preconceived notions, San Francisco

Andrea Hyson,
San Francisco, CA.

About two months ago, I finally met a new employee in another department. This woman and I had numerous phone conversations but hadn’t yet met. I decided to stop by her office to introduce myself. Another employee was at her door as I approached. As I turned into her office, the other employee introduced me and woman literally had a physical reaction. She jumped back in her seat and looked shocked and while recovering said, “You’re Andrea.”

It caught me off guard but at the same time I smiled. I am so use to people having some preconceived notation of who I am. I just shook my head and presented my hand with a smile. I do my job and run my business based on my knowledge base not my color or sexual orientation.
I’m a CPA who owns a small tax business while working a full-time job in the tax department of a privately owned investment company. I am approaching my 10 year anniversary.

As an out lesbian with short hair (sometimes bald) on the butch side of the equation, I am who I am and can’t and never would change it. I like me.

Why can’t I just be me?

September 29, 2015September 29, 2015 black man, Charles C. Chatman, explain, Hanover Park, IL, just, ME, preconceived notions, stereotypes, work

Charles C. Chatman,
Hanover Park, IL.

As a black man, I feel that when I enter a room, I must explain my reason for being there. When I go to work, I have to explain every decision I make. When I show interest in things that are obscure or not typical of the preconceived black male. . . I have to have a narrative or a story to explain why I like it. I feel as if I’m not allowed to just “be”.

Race is fear of the unknown

April 12, 2013 Ann Arbor, fear, Marissa Allegra, MI, preconceived notions, Race, unknown

Marissa Allegra ’16
Ann Arbor, MI

The human race is known throughout history to have segregated, alienated, and judged others on the basis of being different. Whether this deals with religion, country of origin, cultural choices, or most significantly, one’s race, we rely on pre-conceived notions of a person based on the superficial. We wish that these minute differences were only significant in shaping our perspectives, and creating diversity, but rather they have been the rooted cause of social prejudice, slavery, and war. Race is fear of the unknown. Race is the fear of what we cannot understand.

Race means when you run around

April 9, 2013 African American, Black History Month, Britney Spears, Brooklyn, daughter, music, NY, preconceived notions, Race

Eric
Brooklyn, NY

I gave my daughter a calendar of notable African-Americans for Black history month. She thumbed through the pages and then announced “hey you know who’s missing from this calendar, Britney Spears”. I told her Britney Spears is not in the calendar because she’s not African American, to which she replied “she’s not?”. I still remain unsure whether my daughter actually knows what Britney Spears looks like. I do know that she is familiar with at least some of her more tame songs. I would like to think that my daughter’s reaction has something to do with her relating to race on a level that is other than what is visual.

Perhaps the rhythms and the feelings she gets from listening to Britney Spears somehow reminds her of something familiar in music that she equates with an African-American cultural experience. It is also quite possible that she just has no idea what Britney Spears looks like. I am half black half white, I grew up in Brooklyn New York and Boston Massachusetts, and I have always been acutely aware of race. With my background, I have always been conscious that certain stereotypes and perceptions of race are founded in reality, that certain stereotypes are in fact physical, cultural and social predispositions of a particular racial group. However, once you are exposed in a substantive way to people you realize some are good, some are bad, some are kind, some are selfish and race is not the common denominator that will allow you to characterize who is who.

So, to the extent that we all have our preconceived notions of what race is, I wonder if we close our eyes and evaluate each other based on something other than what we see does race really even exist? I am still unsure what to make of my daughter’s reaction to the calendar and what it says about her perception of race. It did not help to clarify things when this morning I described this project to my wife in the car. I simplified this task by asking my wife to “describe what race means to you in six words”. While my wife pondered the question, my daughter chimed in from the backseat “race means when you run around”. Six words. From the mouths of babes.

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