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A delusion based on an illusion.

Courtney Tolbert,
Washington, DC

I believe that our acceptance of racial classifications as an informative, science-based tool for perceiving and understanding each other is at the crux of our ever-evolving discord. It is a tool relevant only as a means to extract value away from individuals for purposes of exploitation and a device to coddle those with underdeveloped psychological maturity or self knowledge/acceptance. “Race” coddles the insecure and attempts to control those who are considered “the other”. As long as we continue to use this way of thinking as a tool within our cultural development, we will never be able to get beyond it’s fallacies and will always revisit issues we tell ourselves have been “put to rest”. Those who are emboldened only by a false sense of inherit superiority will never, truly feel whole and will continue to act out, angrily, and with the same violence they inflict upon themselves internally, to those identified as the ‘other’ externally.

Best Audio Book Selection The Seattle Times

The intimacy and authenticity of these responses, anonymous and otherwise, translate well to audio through the aid of a seemingly countless array of narrators. The result achieves the seemingly impossible: a national Town Hall expertly moderated by Norris herself, on a topic nobody wants to talk about, in which everyone hears and is heard. An unforgettable and vital listening experience deserving of the widest possible audience.

“Don’t act your color”? We’re radiant!

Avis Danette Matthews,
Glenarden, MD

“Don’t act your color.” I recall hearing that phrase a lot while growing up in the ’60s in Prince George’s County, Md., a Washington, D.C., suburb. On a 5th-grade field trip, as the school desegregation debate boiled on medium, one of my beloved black teachers gave us that instruction as we prepared to get off the bus to tour one of D.C.’s many monuments and museums. For the first time, the thought occurred to me, militantly: “How come? Why not act our color?!” In a flash, I envisioned our school, my classmates, our parents and siblings in our warm and loving homes within our nurturing community; our trusted teachers and perfect principal; our weekend Camp Fire and scout activities; our backyard kickball and football games; our annual go-kart race; our parents moving their cars so we could have the whole street for sledding in the best of snowstorms; our summer dashes to the ice cream truck — and I felt adamant that WE SHOULD ACT OUR COLOR. I didn’t say all this to my teachers on the bus, of course. Years later, seeing those same teachers at funerals and celebrations and such, standing adult to adult with them, I realized that they had known it, too — we WERE radiant.

Two white dads. Three black kids.

image9Jack Montgomery,
Washington, DC.

My husband and I got married and adopted three beautiful children on the same day last summer. Happy times! I have learned more since these kids have arrived than I ever new possible. A same-sex parent family with trans racial kids draws a lot of attention both in the big city and in a rural Wal-Mart.

Think you cute because you’re lightskin?

Kwazi Owens
Washington, DC

I see so much divisiveness among black women due to colorism. I remember growing up and girls automatically not liking me just because of my complexion and me feeling the need to reel in my personality as not seem as though I’m trying to be “better” than others. As an adult still seeing the same issues amongst black women breaks my heart.

“Are they yours? Are you sure?”

Adam Conner
Washington, DC

My sister and I are both adopted from South Korea. Our parents are white. One of my memories from childhood is being at the grocery store and constantly having people ask my mom “Are they yours?” point to my sister and me. I remember one time someone then adding “Are you sure?” As if my mom was going to look over and realize then that “whoa these kids are asian! thank you stranger in a grocery store for pointing that out to me!”

What does Puerto Rican look like?

Janet Jimenez
Washington, DC

Puertorriqueño(a) is the “proper” term used to address a native islander from Puerto Rico. Do not confuse with Newyoricans, or anyone else born outside the island to Puertorriqueño parents. A real Puertorriqueño(a) knows the words to “La Borinqueña”, speaks Spanish (FLUENTLY), has lived on the island, and cries to the words of “En Mi Viejo San Juan”. Other terms used to refer to a person from “La Tierra del Encanto” are: Puertorro(a) = a shortened version, Borinqueño(a) = after the island’s Taino name “Borikén”; and Boricua = a variant of the previous. The terms Boricua or Puertorro(a) can sometimes be insulting, particularly to an affluent person. However, average people, especially those from the “caserios”, do not typically mind these terms. I copied this from Urban Dictionary as its the one definition I like the best. People mistake me for Lebanese, or some mixed race Latina. Parents are straight up from PR. Gray eyes on the paternal grandparents side and white skin as well. It’s been an interesting subject to explore. What do you say?

“Are they yours? Are you sure?”

Adam Conner
Washington, DC

My sister and I are both adopted from South Korea. Our parents are white. One of my memories from childhood is being at the grocery store and constantly having people ask my mom “Are they yours?” point to my sister and me. I remember one time someone then adding “Are you sure?” As if my mom was going to look over and realize then that “whoa these kids are asian! thank you stranger in a grocery store for pointing that out to me!”

Black Girls Don’t Get Depressed…Wrong!

1604453_10102150204694521_7561157379705302503_nTori Collins,
Washington, DC.

Depression is real and doesn’t care about your race. If you’re African-American and female not only are you expected to be resilient enough to just take the hits and keep going, if you can’t due to emotional or mental illness, you’re considered to have an attitude, you’re a mean or a Black b**ch.

Why do people steal from us?

Peter Chin
Washington, DC

That was the question that my daughter asked me when our house was broken into a second time in three years. As a Korean-American living and working in a predominantly African-American neighborhood, I was tempted to answer her question by telling her about the long-standing hostilities between the two groups. But I didn’t. I understand the need to be honest with our children about the realities of the world, I really do. But I also understand that children do not interpret what we teach them in the subtle way in which we would like them do. I might think that I am giving a nuanced lesson in history, when all her young mind hears is, “People of that race don’t like me because I’m a different race.” And even after all that my family has been through, I really don’t think that dynamic is true, and neither do I want it to become true for her, and for others. And so I hugged her and told her that we don’t anything that we can’t live without, and she accepted that answer…for now.

“The only Mexicans I’ve ever met ..”

Josie Villanueva
Washington, DC

“… pick our melons on my Daddy’s farm.” she said to me, with wide eyes, on one of the first days at Hoosier Girls State. I was one of the very few Latinas in the program, a delegate chosen for my academic excellence and leadership at my high school. I think it was her surprise at seeing me there that was the most heartbreaking. I was 17 years old and the year was 2005.

Now, I can protest that murder

David C. Ruffin
Washington, DC

I participated in the March on Washington in 1963. I was 18 and home on leave from the Air Force. My most enduring memory of the March was a conversation I had with an older man on the train ride from Pittsburgh to Washington the night before. He told me that when he was in the Army in the Jim Crow South during World War II, he witnessed the murder of another black soldier. He was powerless to do anything about it at that time, but the March finally gave him an opportunity to protest the killing.

I had been based in Texas where I was subjected to racial discrimination. The March was also means for me to stand up against racism. Below is my short remembrance of that time.
Stood-Up-at-March

Grandfather’s poker gift a hanging invitation

photo (31)Carol Zachary,
Washington, D.C.–and Montana.

Somehow I kept blocking on three things: A) the six words. . . grandfather, poker, three hangings, an invitation lost for almost 60 years, and my changed perceptions;
B ) the fact that I’ve felt I should know exactly what evidence was presented against the men who were hanged; and C) the lingering question–did my grandfather’s actions help direct me toward family history, or did he see something in me that told him I would cherish his “gift” and do something with it, or was it just the only unique thing he could give a grandchild for winning at nine-card stud. When I finally realized I needn’t answer “B” and “C,” at least not for your project, then I got to “A.”

Listen to Carol Zachary’s story on NPR’s Morning Edition.

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