Mary Zeitner
Edmonds, WA
I had just moved back to Seattle in late April from Arizona where I worked nights and spent most of the day outdoors, so my skin tone was quite a bit darker than people in the neighborhood, many of whom were of Scandinavian or Native background. It was twilight and as I crossed the street, that was what some guys yelled from behind me. It felt unsafe and, but as I was near my car and other people were around, I ignored them. However, I was somewhat taken aback by my inner reaction–“Thanks for noticing, Low Life.” I realized that, although proud of my Native heritage, we have “passed” for many generations and I was raised thoroughly white. On many occasions, however, from childhood on, I have worked very hard to balance the degree to which I “advertise” my Indian-ness. The inner vs the outer reality. I also realized that with several of my very long-time friends, also Native and who also “pass,” that we have never discussed this inner tug-of-war. We must all live with similar thoughts, though from different backgrounds, don’t we?